Before my mother-in-law left town the other day I asked if I could just go and get away to think for a little bit.  I had a couple of errands I wanted to run and just wanted to be by myself for a little bit before I was left with the three littles to corral by myself until who-knows-when.

One of the things on my list was to get something to help me get through this time of uncertainty and waiting.  I had finished my yearly Bible reading plan in mid-October and needed something…fast…before I lost momentum, knowing that my family is very vulnerable right now.  Also very well aware that attack is eminent.  I need to be on guard for this family God has given me.

I scanned the small Christian Living section at Barnes-n-Noble and my eyes landed on a book that I’d seen and heard of, but knew nothing about.  The book is Ann Voskamp‘s, “One Thousand Gifts, A dare to live fully right where you are“.

I didn’t know how perfect this book was going to be for what we are going through right now.  This morning I read a segment where Ann writes on how a God can allow terrible things to happen.  Let me just write what she says:

“‘His secret purpose framed from the very beginning <is> to bring us to our full glory’ (I Corinthians 2:7 NEB).  He means to rename us-to return us to our true names, our truest selves.  He means to heal our soul holes.  From the very beginning, that Eden beginning, that has always been and always is, to this day, His secret purpose-our return to our full glory.  Appalling-that He would!  Us, unworthy.  And yet since we took a bite out of the fruit and tore into our own souls, that drain hole where joy seeps away, God’s had this wild secretive plan.  He means to fill us with glory again.  With glory and grace.”

His glory and grace, people!  He allows seemingly hopeless situations to occur to show His glory and grace.

So even if our little girl may not ever be able to come home with us one day, we may quite possibly be making a way for her to be adopted into a different, loving family.  We may be paving a way for many, many others to have a smoother process than us.  Our difficulties can bring God’s glory and grace to light, maybe not the way we had ever imagined or pictured our own adoption journey to result in, but maybe for someone else’s adoptive journey.

His glory and grace is so much bigger than our circumstances.  I know He is holding us and carrying us through this and His glory and grace WILL BE SEEN, even if the end result of our story isn’t as we had hoped.  This story isn’t going to end with ours…

I can live with that.

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